Wednesday, February 25, 2009
I'd like you to meet a dear friend of mine:
Rexworth, my robot T-Rex butler.
I actually found him in early 2005 at some garage sale out in the middle of nowhere. Some kooky old inventor was getting rid of a ton of his old works. Crazy, right? There were all sorts of weird robots and animatronics, from bizarre giraffe-things to huge bulky humanoid androids that look like they could rest the world on their shoulders.
I was instantly drawn to Rexworth because of his top hat. There's just something about a dinosaur in old-school garb that is irresistible and oh-so charming. The inventor's assistant, a rather young boy, clued me in that Rexworth also serves a number of hot beverages through his tail. This, my friends, sealed the deal.
So, for a measly $50, I had a newfound companion. Rexworth gladly makes things that annoy me disappear very quickly. If I'm in need of a hot, tasty beverage, I have to look no further (rather, I have to look behind). And he is a very fuel efficient mode of transportation!
I think the tacked-on arms are a nice piece that I added on myself a few months after I picked him up. It adds a little character, and often gets giggles from the neighborhood children.
Onto a serious note, Rexworth has eaten many things that have caused me any hurt or trouble in the past. And in doing so, made my mind a little more at ease. I'd be selfish to keep this godsend all to myself, so I'll tell you what:
I usually give him Tuesdays and Thursdays off from his duties, so if you have need of him, please let me know. I'm sure he'll be glad to help out any of my friends. You don't have to feed or fuel him, since most things he eats gives him a recharge. And he won't ever ask for payment. He'll be glad to know he can ease your troubles a little, be it with a chomp or a freshly-made cup of hot chocolate.
How does that sound?
Saturday, February 21, 2009
After seeing this Illustration Friday topic posted, this image immediately popped into my head. So I drew it. Yay for commentary on the animalistic qualities of the business world.
And having done so, it just seems awfully familiar. For example, it seems straight out of Gary Larson's The Far Side, right?
Anyway, I just tried doing a search of it online but didn't have any luck finding any sort of match. I apologize if it's been drawn before though. Let me know if I'm right in my suspicions!
Thursday, February 19, 2009
I made this illustration in time to post it to this week's Illustration Friday theme, "Celebrate." I was doubtful that it would happen, so actually making the deadline is reason in itself to celebrate.
To do so, I'll go out and spend money on groceries so that I can eat.
The drawing is of a red velvet wine cake. I guess first you'd eat the top and then drink the velvety wine-juice afterwords? Hahaha.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
This design is dedicated to all those who have fallen whilst providing us with fuel for our fires.
If you watch LOST (the TV show), and especially if you listen to the Jay and Jack and Dharmalars podcasts, you'll know that we're almost out of Log Carrying Guys. I recently found out, thanks to Ralph at the Dharmalars (and also thanks to The Lost Initiative Podcast) that the LCG count is down to approximately three. THREE.
Look, I know we can't save them. They are smoke-monster fodder. Or flaming arrow targets. My initial concept was to push to save them, but I have realized that is futile. Instead, let's just remember them. No need to get our hopes dashed along with those randos' lives.
The design is a dark brown on top of a red (of course) shirt.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Let me start by telling you all how the Grizzly Mage came into fruition:
Last weekend, in New Orleans, some friends and I happened to catch the end of this particularly bad movie called Grizzly Rage. Which, as you've probably surmised, is about this big ol' angry grizzly bear's murderous rampage amongst bad actors. The bear was, in reality, just reacting to the quality of the script.
Anyway, short after viewing this monstrosity, we all went to the Audubon Zoo. There we saw actual grizzly bears. Upon finding them, we made cracks about the bears flying into fits of rage at the people watching them. And I made the comment:
Wouldn't that movie been so much more awesome had it been titled "Grizzly Mage"?
And that birthed this illustration.
But that's not all – I have something to report: Shortly after picturing the GM in my head, I thought "This seems so familiar..."
It turns out, I actually have this stuffed animal somewhere in my room at my parent's house. An actual bear in a wizard's robe and hat, pretty much exactly like what I have drawn up above. Crazy! So I'll take a picture of it and upload it when I can.
And now on to the fun part:
The Illustrious and Epic Backstory of the Grizzly Mage
During the Second Age of Great Green, in the midst of a violent social feud brought about by a particularly oppressive feudal system, there lived a bear.
In all of this green, great land, there wasn't a more content bear than Tuftuft. The often-violent spats between the land's green-clad knights and wily mages hadn't yet reached his secluded cave getaway in the Rockmelt Mountains. What does a bear care for these matters, anyway? As long as there were plenty of fish in his valley's brook and honey in his conveniently low-hanging bee hives, Tuftuft was definitely not going to raise a paw in complaint.
Unbeknownst to our content bear, quite a bit of action would soon find its way into Rockmelt and, in specifically, his valley.
Several of Great Green's big-name knights, along with a cavalcade of citizens from both Big Theremin and Bigger Theremin, had relentlessly pursued their quarry north across the Great Wrinkle, further north through both Arrow Pass and Windhollow (relatively famous for the wind-carved rockchimes that sound natural melodies on particularly windy days), and then a tad east to finally end up in the Rockmelt foothills.
Why all the fuss? The one being pursued was none other than the infamous mage Griswold Fourlegs, who earned the latter part of his name by polymorphing a third of Big Theremin's population into various farm animals for sport. Not taking kindly to this sadistic jest, Lords Mars Bolden and Thomas Shine of the Roots Guild took up arms and whipped up a flash mob of locals into action. Unfortunately for Fourlegs, the citizens of Big Theremin were in exceptional condition due to frequent competitions to prove themselves to their slightly-larger sister city, Bigger Theremin. It was a very long and unusual foot race. The several hundred farm animals following in stride only added to the spectacle.
Tuftuft first became alerted when some resounding vibrations knocked a fresh catch of fish off of his dinner rock-table. "Rrr?" he grumbled, as his furry ears perked up. In the middle of debating whether or not to leave his cozy cave to investigate the matter, the light at the entrance was blotted out. Anxious shots and angry threats drowned our bear's curious "Rrr?!?"
The Lords, the green-clad knights and the remaining two-thirds of Big Theremin had chased Fourlegs (huffing and puffing) all the way into the mouth of Tuftuft's dimly-lit domicile.
The din in the den was almost unbearable. Soon confusion was sardined in along with everything else. The mass of pursuers bottlenecked at the entrance, leaving Fourlegs to speed onwards unmolested, right into Tuftuft.
All that our bear had time to do was gasp in reaction. The frantic mage, however, didn't have time to do anything. Not seeing Tuftuft in the absence of a decent amount of lighting, Foulegs ran straight into the open maw of the bear, where the light was definitely not better. The villain's momentum made him an easy swallow, in terms of difficulty. Taste was another matter. You can imagine Tuftuft's disappointment, as he realized his yummy fresh fish was replaced by a sour, malnourished mage.
What happened next was a first in the history of Great Green. Or, rather, it was the first recorded incident of its kind. The following was later added into the Rules of Magick:
"If One who pracktises the art of Magick has been heartily consumed thusly by Another or any of the Beasts in the Realm, thine unfortunate One's powers shall be inherited by said Consumer, verily. Lo and behold, thus is thy Thirteenth Rule of Magick." - Coniperus XIV
Everyone wedged together at the cave entrance simultaneously gasped, allowing a little extra wiggle room with which to break up the bottleneck. The bear had just spoken aloud:
"My, that was plum awful."
Most people present, mystified by a talking bear, dropped their weapons. They could not quite understand what happened. None of their citizens-turned-animals could talk. Had Fourlegs turned himself into a bear and was preparing to eat them all? Some of the mob bent down to reclaim their arms.
Just then, Tuftuft coughed up one of Fourleg's shoes. A cheer swept through the mob. The two Lords approached the enlightened bear. "What is thoust name, noble beast?" asked Lord Bolden. Lord Shine nudged him with his armored elbow. "Ahem, pardon me, noble bear."
"I believe my name is Tuftuft, but I cannot be sure. I seem to remember being called by that years ago, but, as you can tell, I haven't been amongst the most chatty of fellows."
A titter went through the crowd. " Methinks 'ee means de animals, methinks!" guffawed some anonymous, yet still qite audibly pleased, citizen.
The Lords and knights supposed it was quite easy for everyone to warmly embrace the idea of a talking, magical bear, if said bear had just assisted them in putting an end to a vile excuse for a mage. Once the situation was explained, and much celebrating was had, Tuftuft was convinced by his new fans to join them in returning to the more urban parts of the Great Green. Tuftuft, quickly realizing that the ordinary bear-life would no longer suit him, and eager to explore his newfound intellect and reason, agreed to the request.
Returning to his den to pack his fish and other bear necessities, Tuftuft stumbled upon some items that he had never taken heed of before (remember, bears didn't really take notice of human this-and-thats). He was quite surprised to find that his den's floor was lined with manuscripts, loose pages, worn books, various trinkets, and even a portrait or two. Gathering up the items that were still salvageable, Tuftuft gently placed everything a large sheet that was provided by one of the Big Thereminians, and walked out into the sunlight.
He was greeted by another gasp.
One of the portraits, much too large to be fully concealed by the sheet, showed a much-younger Griswold Fourlegs standing next to another young mage. Fourlegs had on a look that could be likened to one of contempt, while the mage on the right looked genuinely happy. This may be attributed to the fact that the portrait also showed Fourlegs holding a Silver Maging Medallion and the other figure sporting a Golden Maging Medallion. The difference in medals was almost as clear as the difference in character. The goodly mage on the right, holding the Gold, had a smile that looked as if it could hold one spellbound in itself. Fourleg's scowl could only cast fear and spite.
Upon removing the portrait from the bear's to-go package, Lord Shine examined the nameplate at the bottom of the frame.
"The 101st Annual Great Green Mage-Off.
Silver Mage Griswold of Bigger Theremin.
Gold Mage Tuftil of Big Theremin. Congratulations!"
"Tuftil? MAGE TUFTIL? Tuftuft? Is that you???" cried Lord Bolden.
"I've read about you in Great Green Heroes and Legendary Figures, Vol. 2, methinks!" cried the aforementioned anonymous citizen.
"Err..mayhaps?" Tuftuft puzzled his brain for a minute. "I do seem to recognize that shoe I coughed up."
So, in conclusion, that day was marked in the annals of Great Green as one of remarkable events and revelations. The town of Big Theremin had traded a most foul plight for the return of one of its heroes to its streets. Tuftuft, formerly Tuftil of maging fame, had been polymorphed by a jealous Griswold Fourlegs some time after winning the Maging Tournament. As a bear, Tuftuft had made a quiet niche far away in the Rockmelt range, ignorant of the atrocities for which Fourlegs would eventually become infamous. Remember, what do bears care for human matters?
Though this is the end of how the Grizzly Mage came to be, it is surely not the end of the Great Green tales that tell of his adventures. Remember, there is much to be righted, and there are plenty of skewed characters out there that need to be polymorphed into honeypots and such. I hope these tales some day find their way to you.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
The theme for this week's Illustration Friday creation is "Time."
And what better time to draw a giant using a church's steeple-clock as a wristwatch? I think, somewhere buried in there, you can find a message that "time destroys all religion." ISN'T THAT DEEP??? Actually, I just wanted to draw something silly, and that unintended philosophical mind-bender wormed itself into there, somehow.
I also thought about drawing a grandfather clock nursing some baby cell phones. Or the absurd image of some pompous rich guy (mustached, of course) toting around a grandfather clock in his pocket, in leu of a pocketwatch.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
The illustration above cannot be explained. Without using words. So here you go:
This past Saturday, before the awe-inspiring Andrew Bird show, some friends and I went to the Audubon Zoo in New Orleans. The animals were all asking for us, so we had to go.
I was wandering about the reptile/amphibian display with my friends Paul and Rodney. We were taking in all sorts of exotic and not-so-exotic creatures, all of whom were lounging in their display cases. After returning the blank gaze of some particularly lethargic lizards, we found ourselves face to face with some toads. We all cracked up: These toads had the most entertaining faces. So we instantly gave them a voice and started putting words in their mouths:
"Heyyy guyssssss, wwwwwwhat's up?"
"I like to parrrrty! I just lllllicked myself OOOoOoOo"
And then it was called to attention that the toads were actually making Rodney's trademark Rodney Face™. Similar to Baby Rodney™ and Rodney Cat™. And then it was agreed that Rodney Toad™ must be illustrated and logged into the annals of the internet.
So be it.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Here's a poster I did for Andrew Bird's upcoming show at the House of Blues, New Orleans. I designed it as a personal project and to help promote the show. The music has influenced me greatly, to the point that I bought a violin and started taking lessons. I owe a lot to Mr. Bird and I thought this would be a good way to express my appreciation for the music. As well as come up with a nice portfolio piece.
Unfortunately, it was too costly to screen print. It was also too costly to digital print on nice paper. So I, for the moment, am stuck with just being able to post it online. Sorry, Mr. Bird. I did all I could.
Anyway, I started off making the silhouette and type in Illustrator. I printed out and traced everything with a Sharpie to get a hand-drawn feel, then scanned & vectored it. And voila.
Hope everyone likes it. I know I'll have a blast at the show! Ohhhh, that's in two days! Hahaha.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Now, I know that getting a "9" in any judged contest is pretty sweet, but does it bug you a little bit that you just weren't perfect enough for this guy? Right? It's ok. Better luck next time.
The theme for this week's (and my first submission to the site) is Flawed. Society is a cruel beast!
Monday, February 2, 2009
Socrateeth was my second attempt at submitting something to Threadless.com. I believe it was around August of last year (2008). Originally inspired by my friends Tim and Rachel, who wanted me to help them design a shirt for the UL Philosophy Club, Socrateeth was birthed from the pun-track mind of yours truly. Pun-track mind? How do I do it??
This shirt was also passed over by Threadless, but the demand was so high that I had the design printed locally on a short run. I might have to do that with WereWaldo!
Now, if I can only get my own screen press set up. Then I'd be in business!
Funapeeling was my first foray into shirt designs. The title, of course is a play on the word "Unappealing." It'd be unappealing to be the astronaut in the illustration, no? And "peal" is spelled "peel" for pun's sake.
Anyway, it didn't get selected to be printed. It was interesting how many people got hung up on the astronaut's foot bleeding off of the illustration. As if I just forgot to draw it or something. It's a design element to lead you into the drawing, since people read from left to right, from top to bottom. Well, in English, anyway.
Hmm that last paragraph began and ended with the word "anyway." Interesting. Hmm.
Jumping to the present day, this is a t-shirt design that I recently submitted to Threadless.com. Even more recently, they sent me a rejection letter, stating that they would rather stay away from pop-culture icons in fear of lawsuits. Which I wouldn't blame them for doing, except that they already printed this. If you risk incurring the wrath of George Lucas, I don't think you fear anything. So what's up now, Threadless?
It's ok; I have several more shirt designs that don't involve copyright infringement.
PS - After five attempts to get a decent resolution posted, I've succeeded. I think the internet likes PNG files.
I had so much fun doing this mini-comic. It still makes me laugh.
This was another creation that was spawned during my time in college. I'm pretty sure it was my first attempt at an actual comic layout (I haven't forgotten about you, Campus Hijinx). I should draw another one featuring Admiral Ackbar, shouldn't I? Yes, I thought so.
A long, long time ago a girlfriend of my best friend asked me to draw her some polar bears attacking Ronald McDonald for her birthday. Well, I did that. And before I knew it, I got carried away and created this... jumble of actual and non-actual characters. I think there's a little bit of everything there. Wolverine is hugging Jimi Hendrix, for Pete Venkman's sake!
Peter Venkman not pictured, unfortunately.
After I was done, I snapped out of my creative daze and realized that I actually had to give this away. At least I scanned it! This is obviously a low-res version. I hope the internet treats it well, quality-wise!